Sunday Sport 2014-07-13.pdf

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Tragedy as history repeats itself
FULL HORROR STORY – PAGE 13
Lucy
Pinder
STARKERS
– centre
pages
2
July 13, 2014
WorldMags.net
Last Ramone
Tommy dies
TRIBUTES have poured in
for Tommy Ramone, the
last surviving member of
seminal punk band The
Ramones, after he died
while undergoing cancer
treatment.
The drummer (above),
born Erdelyi Tamas in
Hungary and a founding
member of the band, died
age 62 on Friday in a New
York hospice, where he
was being treated for bile
duct cancer.
Put together by Tommy
and three school pals in
1974 The Ramones, who
had hits with tracks such
as
I Wanna Be Sedated
and
Blitzkrieg Bop,
have
been credited with
inventing punk rock.
Celebrities paid tribute
to the rocker, including
comedian Noel Fielding
who tweeted: “Oooooooh
Tommy Ramone x”
HOUSE OF PERVS
By BARNEY SAMUELS
news@sundaysport.co.uk
A TOP child protection
official has claimed his
warnings about the
threat of a Westminster
based nonce network
were ignored because
“there were too many
of them over there”.
15
16
Aberdeen
Official warned not to report beasts because
there were ‘too many’ nonces at Westminster
Mr Tombs claims that
when Righton was arrested
he became aware of informa-
tion
through
the
police
investigation that suggested
a paedophilic network was
operating.
He said what he learned
would have been of “national
concern” and told BBC Radio
4’s
Today
programme: “It was
coming across to me at the
David Tombs, who ran
Hereford and Worcester social
services, said he warned
the government after the
arrest of paedophile Peter
Righton in 1992.
18
Edinburgh
Glasgow
19
19
Belfast
Newcastle
time that there were names
there
that
were
linked
into the Establishment, if
you like.
“I had no particular names,
but that was the impression I
was getting.”
He said when he alerted
the Department of Health he
was told by civil servants that
he was “probably wasting
[his] time” because there were
“too many of them over there”.
Asked what he thought was
meant by the word “them”,
Mr Tombs said “those within
Parliament and government
in Whitehall”.
He added: “I was angry. I
was furious. It seemed to me
that the one place I should be
able to come to, to alert the
nation to this issue, was the
Department of Health.”
Tim Yeo MP, a junior health
minister in the early 1990s,
said he was “staggered” by the
claims, saying on Today: “I
think it’s incredible, the idea
that any remotely credible
evidence had been shown to a
civil servant at the Department
of Health would have been
ignored and received the
comment that it
apparently was.
“The thing is
extraordinary.”
21
TODAY’S WEATHER
THREE-DAY WEATHER OUTLOOK
TUES:
Cloudy
WED:
Well OK
THURS:
Well wet
95
CLOUDY with heavy
rain for most of Britain
Liverpool
on Sunday.
Wettest
will
be
24
central and eastern
Manchester
UK. Slightly drier in
Norwich
the west, with
17
Birmingham
22
things
even
brightening up
Cardiff
21
in the east.
Bristol
Parts of the
East Midlands
London
20
and London will
23
Plymouth
see temperatures
of 19C, but it is likely
20
to be wet and windy and
Leeds
24
‘PERVERTS’
PALACE’:
It’s alleged
civil servants
said paedos
swarmed
Parliament
WorldMags.net
chilly at Scotland’s T In
The Park festival.
Further showers on
Monday but hings will
brighten up on Tuesday,
when most will see
warm sunny spells.
OUTLOOK: Rain and
shine.
ULSTER FIGHTING ‘PEACEFUL’
TROUBLE flared in Ulster during
its traditional July 12 fighting.
The clashes began during the
Eleventh Night, an annual fighting
season celebration involving the
lighting of bonfires, on Friday
night, with eight arrests.
Officers dealt with incidents in
north and west Belfast and those
detained were a 17-year-old male
youth and seven men aged 22 to 34.
Separately, police are treating a
sectarian attack on an Orange Hall
in County Antrim as a hate crime.
Republican and sectarian graffiti
was painted on the hall at Coleraine
Road, Ballycastle, but police said
the night was relatively peaceful.
WorldMags.net
Age 22, 32H-26-36, from Cardiff
July 13, 2014
3
Joey Fisher
Kim can’t
wait to be
a MILF!
RANDY reality TV
babe Kim Kardashian
reckons she’s sexier
than ever after giving
birth – and hopes
blokes still want to
SHAG her!
The pretty Yank
(above), who recently
married outspoken
rapper Kanye West,
gave birth to their
daughter North last
year.
And she says her
famous curves are in
better shape than ever,
and claims that she’s
desperate to be a
MILF!
Kim, 33, said: “I am
definitely way sexier
since having my
daughter.
“The struggle to get
back into shape after
giving birth is such a
real one. It’s so difficult
to do, and afterwards,
all you want to do is
show off your body and
feel sexy.
“I mean, my style’s
definitely more simple.
I just want to be a
MILF!”
The Californian cutie
has also told how baby
North already has a
clear sense of style.
She added: “She likes
greys, creams, oatmeal
colours and black.”
WorldMags.net
TELLY totty Melanie Sykes
says the breakdown of her
marriage hasn’t put her
off men, insisting she still
loves the COCK!
Stunning Mel, 43, split
up with second husband
Jack Cockings last year
after just seven months of
marriage.
However, the pretty
presenter (above) reckons
her lust for blokes is just
as strong as ever.
When asked if she was
“off men”, she said: “Of
course not. I don’t want a
relationship, but I’m not
off men – I like men.”
The Manchester lass
returns to screens this
week, hosting the second
series of daytime TV show
Let’s Do Lunch With Gino
& Mel.
Lifting the lid on why
she gets on with co-host,
Italian chef Gino D’Acampo,
37, she reckons it’s down
to their love of mucky talk.
She added: “There’s
nothing Gino can say that
shocks me…ever. He’s
naughty and so am I.”
Mel still well
keen on men
4
July 13, 2014
HE TAKES
ALL THE
WEEK’S
NEWS &
PULLS ITS
PANTS
DOWN
MONDAY
WorldMags.net
WORLD CUP
HUN-BELIEV
By CARL CHADWICK
news@sundaysport.co.uk
PREPARE to be shocked, folks –
because your
Sunday Sport
is
supporting GERMANY in the World
Cup Final!
That’s right, we’ve decided to cheer
on the Krauts when they take on
Argentina tonight.
But why on Earth would we choose to
get behind our arch enemies?
Well, it’s A HEIL OF A LOT better
than the alternative – backing those
corned beef-scoffing Argies!
As well as teaching ‘Ze Germans’ a
lesson in World War Two, we trounced
them on the footie pitch on that magical
afternoon in 1966, and they’ve been the
bane of British life ever since.
We never thought we’d say this
but…
COME ON YOU KRAUTS!
Dastardly
DOCTOR Who
scripts are leaked online.
Spoiler alert! If you’re a
Doctor Who
fan
and don’t want to know how things end, look
away now…
You will die a virgin, having lived in your
parents’ boxroom all your adult life.
But tonight, we’ll be singing for our
European neighbours as they look to
obliterate one of our even greater foes,
the dastardly island-stealing Argies.
Both sides will vie for the biggest
accolade in world football tonight in a
showdown which is sure to be a blood and
thunder affair.
And despite their shady past, the
Germans are definitely the lesser of two
evils. Even though the towel-lovers
have their faults, watching them
steamroller the samba-shambles that
UP FÜHR THE
CUP: We back
Kraut team to
be champions
TUESDAY
BRAZIL’s
footballers
are
spanked 7-1 by Germany.
A ‘Brazilian’ used to be a
sexy word meaning a lady’s
shaven pubic area.
In football it now has a
similar meaning. If your team
‘does a Brazilian’, it means
they looked like fannies, with
nothing up front and totally
exposed at the back.
was Brazil in last week’s semi-final
was a masterclass in how to exploit
weaker opposition.
You don’t have to like them, but you
can’t help but admire them! Be it their
ruthless efficiency and steely win-at-all-
costs determination, they almost never
fail to get the job done – something Roy
Hodgson’s toothless lions could learn a
trick or two from.
WEDNESDAY
A DAY of double sporting
disaster for British sport, as
Kenyan-born cyclist Chris
Froome pulls out of the Tour
de France and our cricketers
suffer yet another collapse.
We must get to grips with
this failure as a matter of
urgency. I demand a root and branch overhaul
of how sport is taught in African schools.
DANKE,
us for our support
German Embassy thanks
A TOP German diplomat has
personally thanked
Sunday Sport
for
cheering on the Krauts!
Over the years, we’ve had fun
reminding the Germans about their
military failings, slamming their sense of
humour bypass and ripping the piss out of
them for everything from their dress sense
to their food.
But all is forgiven – because dignitaries
at the German Embassy in London say
they’re chuffed to bits that we’ve decided
to bury the hatchet and lend them our
loyal support.
Ahead of the 8pm clash, Niklas
Manhart told us: “We are happy that
Sunday Sport
is supporting us, and we are
happy for every supporter we get.
“We need this support, as it’s going to
be a tight game with two teams with a
great footballing history.”
Glad to help, Niklas...but just this once!
THURSDAY
UK travellers struggle
with
new
airport
security rules which
demand all phones
must be charged up.
The main scare
involves iPhone and
iPads. I’ve always
said those gadgets
cost a bomb. One way or another, it seems
they really do.
I’m not sure who I’d rather sit next to on a plane:
a terrorist with a fake phone or a normal person with
a real one. At least the terrorist won’t be taking a
f***ing ‘selfie’ every five minutes.
20
REASONS TO
(RELUCTANTLY)
BACK THE BOCHE
1.
Claudia Schiffer
(right) and her
gloriously clean arse.
2.
Seventies’ dessert
favourite Black Forest
gateaux.
3.
Heroin.
4.
The useful word
‘Schadenfreude’, which
is what we’ll feel if
either team gets
beaten.
5.
Encouraging
nudity on holiday.
you’re into it, Berlin
scat dungeons are the
best in the world. We’re
told.)
8.
Sausages.
9.
Lager.
10.
They build BMWs
and Audis – cars which
make twats instantly
identifiable on the road
and easy to avoid.
11.
Our Royal Family.
12.
Crystal meth.
13.
They kill lots of the
French.
14.
All them brilliant
war films which revel
The NHS is set to carry
our weight-loss surgery
on millions more Brits, it
is revealed.
The ops will cost
billions but, on the plus
side, if we burn all the
excess fat it’d generate
enough power to run all
the street lamps in a city the size of Coventry.
Which makes sense, because that is where
most of the fat f***ers live.
FRIDAY
TOMMY Ramone, the final living
member of punk band The Ramones,
dies.
In tribute, Ramones fans over the
age of 40 put on their favourite
Ramones album – while fans under
40 don their fave Ramones T-shirt.
SATURDAY
They think
Fritz all
over...
6.
Barbituates.
7.
Poo sex (OK,
not everyone’s
cup of tea but if
WorldMags.net
WorldMags.net
FINAL SPECIAL
July 13, 2014
5
VABLE!
SAUSAGE
BEATERS:
Germany’s
strikers will
win day –
with our
backing
GET THEM
KRAUT: Jana
shows her
Zeppelins
Over the years, they’ve also produced
some world class talent off the field, too,
with sexy supermodels Claudia Schiffer,
43, and Heidi Klum, 41, all hailing from
the fatherland of the dirndl and the
lederhosen.
And let’s be fair – they know how to
build a car. Obviously, an Aston Martin
or a Roller would everybody’s first choice,
but Audis and Beemers will do.
Czech-born beauty Jana Defi (right),
a UK based glamour babe who works
for a German agency, says she’s an
honourary Kraut for the day, as well.
She said: “I’ve spent lots of time in
Germany – it’s a fantastic country. I’ll
be cheering them on tonight, and I’m so
happy that
Sunday Sport
is too!”
Bumhole rip
hell of Cup
hero Javier
WORLD Cup ace Javier
Mascherano has told
how he ripped his
ARSEHOLE making a
last-ditch tackle during
Argentina’s win over
the Netherlands.
In the dying moments
of extra time, the Argie
midfielder slid in to
block Arjen Robben’s
goal-bound shot, secur-
ing a penalty shootout
for his team.
However, his match
saving lunge came at a
cost, as he’s revealed
he split his sh*tter.
Barcelona star
Mascherano
(above)
said: “I tore my anus.
“That’s why I was in
so much pain. I don’t
want to sound crude,
but that’s what
happened.”
Earlier in the match,
Mascherano suffered
an apparent concussion
when he clashed with
Georginio Wijnaldum
of the Netherlands.
But the enforcer, 30,
carried on and ended
up playing a pivotal
role in his team’s
victory.
On his team’s World
Cup Final clash with
Germany tonight, he
said: “We will enjoy
it because this only
comes once in a
lifetime.”
SPORT – P62/63
Age 29, 32G-24-34
Jana Defi
Midget
Hold all that up against their South
American rivals, and what have they
given the world besides
Evita,
corned
beef and a coke-snorting midget cheat of
a footballer?
And while both countries have fought
wars against the British Army in living
memory, the battle with Argentina is still
raw – and they won’t give up their absurd
claims on our territory.
So we say COME ON, GERMANY! –
even if it’s just for one night.
I FARTED in a full lift
today, which was
wrong on so many
levels
– Stewart Francis
Hubby hounds
upskirt pervert
A PERVERT was chased
by an angry husband after
trying to take photos up
his wife’s skirt in a
crowded supermarket.
The man was spotted
taking photos with a
mobile phone up the
woman’s skirt in
Sainsbury’s at Calcot,
near Reading, Berks.
A spokesman for
Thames Valley Police
said: “It was obviously an
act outraging public
decency, and when he
was confronted by her
husband, the man left the
store, dismantling his phone.
“We must catch him
before he strikes again.”
in our victories over
them.
15.
Cocaine.
16.
Aldi and Lidl.
17.
Christmas trees.
18.
They invented
printing – and so gave
you
Sunday Sport.
19.
That episode of
Fawlty Towers
20.
Gorgeous Jana
Defi (right). OK, she’s
actually Czech – but
she works for a
German modelling
agency.
WorldMags.net
MORE
WORLD
CUP ON
PAGES
6&7
SEALSKINFUL
A “SEAL” spotted lying
in the High Street turned
out to be a drunken
midget in a black
leotard, authorities in
Bala, Gwynedd, have
revealed.

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